Dear Hell, Merry Christmas, Love Neko

As you can see by the new counter, I relapsed into smoking again over the holiday. It seems that I just couldn't stand 4 days at home with my family without lighting up. So, I am going to try again and try again and try again as many times as it takes until I finally quit. The difference in the way I feel, physically, is acutely noticable, as is the difference in my mental state. I'm horribly unhappy lately, but feel physically better when I don't smoke.

I've started a "fitday" account and am trying to keep track of what goes into the belly. There's a brand new jumprope and set of weights on my bedroom floor, looking to be put into action soon. Maybe tonight, I'll start that workout regimen that Shenry pencilled out for me. At the very least, I should find my yoga book. I picked up a fitness book at the bookstore today, with my gift certificate. We'll give the whole body health thing a try.

The only reason I haven't spent any money lately is that I don't have any. In fact, my bank account is overdrawn and I owe the check cashing place part of my next paycheck. So, the spending is under control if only out of necessity. I've got my lunch in the fridge, which I'm forgetting for the past 2 hours. Crap. I went downstairs to the crappy cafeteria and bought my regular coffee (3 creamers) there instead of Starbucks. I told myself that I'd allow a daily trip to Starbucks only until Christmas was over. So, it's the shitty coffee for me until I can consistantly remember to grind my own the night before.

I'm telling you, once I get this shit down and keep after myself for it, life will be sweet. In about 6 months, life will be great, but only if I can keep up the discipline. Hmmm....Neko could use a little discipline, couldn't she?