Hell is a Vacant Lot

I'm home again. My lover has a skewed work schedule, which allows me to be away from my father's house Wednesday night through Saturday morning. I left my father's house in anger. I overheard him saying something on the phone about my current love interest. Well, it wasn't good. Despite having only shared company with Spike for a mere 2 minutes, he's passed a judgement which was summed up in one comment, "I hope she gets over it soon." Where does he get off?! Since my father decided to direct his career toward massage, he's become a new-agey self-help book reader. So, I constantly receive lectures and speches on forgiveness and free-thinking. The thing that pisses me off is that dad never follows his own advice. He only reads these things and regurjitates them. Once, he even went so far as to suggest that I forgive my ex-husband for the atrocities committed against myself and family. Move on maybe, cope maybe, but forgive? Never. I can understand why my father might be leery of my relationship choices. Did he ask me about Spike after they met? No. Did he express his concerns directly with me? No. That's why I'm pissed. Besides, it hurts for me to hear my father's second hand comments about the man of my dreams. I'm certain that his opinion was based entirely on Spike's hairstyle, which isn't fair in the least.

So, I ran off to spend the rest of the week in bliss. I love Spike. He's affectionate. He's thoughtful. He's generous. He's obviously dedicated. He's gentle and considerate. He remains "the perfect man" for me. Here's an example: On Friday night I had my first Passion Party as a consultant. My dear friend Silver was kind enough to book one. Sadly, there was only one guest, out of the 15 she'd invited. It was a good experience none the less. I got to practice my routine in a comfortable environment and made some sales. When all was said and done, I was a bit tipsy and later than I'd promised getting back to Spike's apartment. Most men I've heard of, get jelous that their girl is out with the ladies. Lots of guys give the cold, brush off treatment when their girl returns home. Instead, do you know what Spike gave me when I got home? He presented me with a plate of homemade chocolate covered strawberries!!! Now, THAT's a MAN!! Read 'em and weep ladies. If dating was a poker game, I'd have a full house.

Regarding Silver's party... She's the only friend who's come through for me (so far) when it comes to supporting my new endeavor. As of yet, her Passion Party is the only one I've booked. I think she handed out at least 15 invitations. Only one guest showed. I feel bad for her. She did all the cooking and all the preparations. She got stood up. This book club we belong to has proven itself to be full of stuck up bitches. Out of a club of 13 members, none showed. The "cool" people who were invited all had valid excuses, so I'm not dogging them. Silver, Random and I need to start our own club. It was suggested, but I'm not sure how serious the other two ladies were. Call me "gung ho" on the idea. Random is a cool chick. Aside from the fact that I'd hook up with her if she were into girls and we were both single, she's a good person.

It's taken me far too long to realize just how great of a friend Silver is. On the surface, she seems tough and confident. While I can't think of any reason she shouldn't be completely full of herself, she's actually more humble than you might expect. She's sensitive. If you've hurt her feelings, she's not the kind of lady to get up in your face. She's also not the type to lay a guilt trip. Silver is so classy that she'll mask her disappointment. Even though she might feel slighted, she won't put it on display and try to get emotional revenge. She'll try to forgive you. I don't mean to say that she's got no dignity, not at all. If Silver is pissed, she'll tell you that she's pissed and list her reasons. She stands proud and projects a powerful presence. She's learned not to compromise. She'll certainly kick your ass if you deserve it.

But, she has a heart. She rewards her close friends with compassion and understanding. She got my brother a job. She tried to help him out even though there were conflicts. She booked a party for me. She put up Random and her family in her own home until they could stand on their own. And those are the big things. There have been times when she'd fed me and borrowed me nicotine. There have been times when, instead of letting me dwell in my depression, she's invited me over to watch Eddie Izzard and drink wine. Sometimes it's the little things that really make a difference.

What I'm really trying to say is, "Thanks Silver". You're appreciated more than you might know. You fuckin' ROCK and I think Shenry made a kick-ass choice when he married you. Someday, I'll get you back. Don't think I've forgotten.